17 darlings, 17

so, 17 is just round the corner (no, the other one....u gottit)...shockingly tht stirs up such an amount of emotion i dont think i feel anything at all. infact, as i was sitting in my living room barely an hour ago , in complete darkness save for the suddenly garish lights of the noel conifer, i was so surprised by my complete lack of feeling (bordering on worried) that i probed myself for...something. i felt something stir and immediately latched on to it like some sort of craving addict. (yep, i was that desperate). turns out it was a bit of sadness, depression if u want, tht the year was over. not the year 2006 exactly, but that a year of looking forward to it was over.....fantasisinng abt gifts, lance, dream days. and, yes *blush* a horoscope in some random teen mag i read in jan that 'on the 19th of dec he realises tht he loves u and needs u'. altho the 18th was supposed 'to feel like magic' and it didnt..unless ofcourse we're allowing black magic. and not the glam kind...the yeucchy kind.

but tht made me feel like expressing (again) something ive been expressing for a while now, that the wait is all the fun! new year's, random school events, anniversaries....all tht is so much nicer looking forward to that the actual day, which is the real reason i think ppl are so glum when its over. until ofcourse the next event to plan comes along. which in my case rite now is christmas! i love looking forward to christmas (as some may have inferred from previous posts). kinda sad tht the whole 12 o clock thing is over, seeing as my fone is in absentia i have 2 to make do with ushering in my 17th year on msn....wonder how thatll be!

hm...i had something to say when i clickd the 'create' tab..honestly. but i cant 4 the life of me remember wht it is...had 2 get up in the middle 2 get something from my room. funny how i almost ran out of there, like i didnt want 2 be reminded of myself, instead i chose 2 sit in the psychdelic glow of a plastic christmas tree. odd. oh, and muck about in the balcony, i swear, i knw i live on the 4th floor, but u can smell the shisha from downstairs! oddly romantic. its this weird smell, coupled with a rather strong wind tht made me feel pretty 17. not 2 sure how its different, but im sure it is. somehow.
biggest shock? prob tht some things never change while other beyond belief